So here we are, a week into SATs and all the stuff that comes with it. We were assured by H’s school that the children wouldn’t be aware they were being tested, and it was all quite gentle which was reassuring.

Then came Tuesday. She fell over in the playground and bumped her head which ended up with me rushing her to A&E once she started feeling groggy. After being checked over and being told she was fine we headed back home, where she had perked up and for once decided to tell us about her school day. (we’ve been having a lot of the “I can’t remember” and “oh stuff” when I’ve asked what she has done that day)

“We had tests today Mummy!” she announced. Hm.

“and we had two yesterday” she added.

Now I’m not blaming the school. Maybe my child is really clued up with what’s going on and sees through the softly softly approach.

“I really like these tests because I get to sit at a desk all on my own!” she added. Apparently all the other children in class have to share a table. I’m not sure why H gets one to herself, and didn’t really ask.

Well, I sort of joked. “Ah, is that so you don’t copy anyone else’s work?”

My six year old looked mortally offended.

Shaun piped up with raised eyebrows which were telling me to shut up “or is it that they don’t want anyone to copy your work”, to which I backed up with an “oh, yes yes, it’ll be that won’t it?” thus giving my child an enhanced version of her own achievements. Well done parents.

She now tells me they had a fourth test today, and it was “lots of fun”??!!?!!? (must take after her dad…)

Anyway, H still plays schools, and often Shaun or I are the pupils while she’s the teacher. I guess this leads to us having tests now in our role play. I can only hope she doesn’t leak them early on a website or change them without anyone having time to prepare anything so the year are doomed to fail before they’ve even started.

I mean, it’s not like anyone would do that to our kids now, would they.

Oh. Hang on….